When I was in the university, I lived such a lonely life. I was a lone ranger, I walked alone, I did my stuff alone. It felt safe for me that I could get my things done all by myself, but of course, when I needed help, I was quick to run to anyone who could help around. But after getting help, I went back to my normal life. It wasn’t as if I didn’t want to connect with people, it was just that I didn’t know how to do it. I always felt everyone had their own class, ”caucus”, and people they roll with, and I just would never be able to fit into such circle.
Then I Graduated from the University
When I got out of the University and started working, I realised that this same habit was still affecting me. I couldnt connect with my colleagues at work. I was that lonely ”girl” that didn’t have people around her. And sincerely, I wanted to be with people. I wanted to know what it felt like to attend ”friends’ party”, give out my number to one fine looking bobo. But it wasn’t happening (oops).
So I Remembered
I wasn’t so bad at making friends while growing up. At least I had a ”boyfriend” whom we had a great relationship at one point in my life. But he sure was probably the only one that got really close to me. Anyways, as I came to work in Lagos, I told myself babe, give yourself brain! Open up and connect with people.
So Here is What I did
I started becoming active on social media, that way, I started getting new friends (virtually and in real life). I even went as far as reaching out to my old classmates. Some of them were surprised that I could connect with them tracing back to who I was back at the University. They started saying- ”babe, you don change oo”. I didn’t know if to take it as a compliment or not, but I decided to take it as positive feedback, (they must have started noticing the change).
Afterwards, I also started attending events, I started becoming more vocal. I remember being so quick to introduce myself to new people I met. And sincerely, I started gaining more confidence to connect with people. I can tell you, since I became more deliberate about building relationships by genuinely connecting with people, I now live a happier life. I am glad to know that people have me as their friends, and they can call me when they need help.
I decided to share this story today to tell you about the importance of deliberately building relationships with people. I hope you learned a thing or two from my story? Hit the comment section and tell me that new habit you just mastered and how you went about it.
Enjoy this short video from the book review: How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie